Not really half...

Something happened today that I have been wanting to happen for awhile. It's good nothing bad. But first I need to give the background as to what I am talking about so, it will be easier to understand.

I have two half sisters. My dad was married before he met my mom. He got married really young and he and his ex-wife have two daughters. When my dad married my mom, my two sisters ( I have always called them sisters because it's easier than just saying half sisters ), were 17 and 18 years old. Needless to say I'm sure they were a little jealous but they were still happy for our dad. My parents had me a year after they were married. So, from that time until I was about 5 or 6 years old I had two older sisters, who played with me, took me out, just tons of fun stuff. I don't know quite what happened but they disappeared. We kept in touch for a little but after that nothing. When I was in grade eight, they both reappeared. The older one was married and just had had a daughter, and the second one was living with her boyfriend and she was very happy. It was awesome. From grade 8 up until grade 12, we saw them often, hung out and grew closer. Then, something happened, miscommunication or something I don't know. But we just stopped talking. Sad. That was 8 years ago.

Today, one of my sisters came to lunch. I was so nervous and excited to see her. My dad has been talking to her on the phone, and she finally came over today. She looks good. And happy. I was so happy to see her. I could feel my eyes tear up when I gave her a hug hello. And I was a little nervous I didn't know what to say. She knows I am getting married, and she did get to meet Jared which I am so happy. We talked a little, I had to go to work. But there was so much I wanted to say but couldn't, it was a little hard. I don't know why. Could be 'cause parts of me is trying to keep my guard up. I don't want her to disappear again, I want her part of my life. Trying not to keep my hopes up, I guess. So then if something happens I won't feel rejected and upset. Let down.

I want both of them there at our wedding. They are my sisters. So many memories there. I want them there for me, to be proud of me. To stand by me as my sisters. We were going to invite them to the wedding anyways, but now it looks like at least one of them will come. I am happy about that. I guess one thing to do is to just take it one day at a time. And be happy with the time I have with her.

I know that I look forward to the next time I get to see her, probably soon. There is still so much to catch up on.

Thanks for listening. Writing this was hard, it's a tough topic for me. I'm getting a little teary eyed just thinking about it. I will most definetly be writing more about this, now that she's back, my sister.